night rant

Back here at this familiar hour. I dont know where to start. I just am so unhappy and lonely. I sound so ungrateful, but it is what it is. I feel so distant with my life. Sometimes, i just feel so useless, like raesa deserves so much more. i dont even feel like a mother at times. Like im just here to take care of her till her dad comes home, feed, bathe, change her for everyone else to see and hold. Thats honestly how i feel.

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